Friday, August 12, 2005


Friday Fun-News in Brief

Big Brother finishes tonight with a prize fund of £50,000 for the winner.

Yes tonight the show reaches its climax and with Eugene and Anthony neck and neck in the race to be crowned winner, there's just one question on everybody's minds - Why the hell do we watch this shite?

Hollywood actress Reese Witherspoon this week admitted she spends the night surfing the net so she can find out what people think of her.

"Sometimes I go onto the internet really late at night and find out what people really think of me - and it hurts my feelings. 'She looks weird. I hate her movies. She stinks.'

Uh yeah, sorry 'bout that. In my defense, I had alot to drink that night and what I said, I didn't mean.

Also this week, Lord Rooker was appointed Minister for Children for the North. Secretary of State Peter Hain went on to express his confidence in Lord Rooker's ability.

Indeed Lord Rooker apparenly beat off stiff competition to land the post, allegedly from one Michael Jackson. (may not be true)

In other news this week, Lord of the Rings star Elijah Wood stated he feared always being remembered as Frodo the hobbit from the film, no matter how many great films he stars in.

Fret not Master Frodo! Just make sure you don't put on the ring! The eye of Sauron, and so forth...

And finally, this week Real Madrid's French star Zinedine Zidane revealed the reason why he returned to the French side - a "mysterious voice" which he claims persuaded him to come out of international retirement and join up with the France team for the remainder of their World Cup qualifying campaign.

"One night, at 3am, I suddenly woke up and I then spoke with someone. But no one knows it. Neither my wife nor anyone else. Until I die I will never tell (who that person was), this is just too crazy," said Zidane.

Responding to the claims, an angry Mick McCarthy denied all involvement.


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