Friday, December 17, 2004


The Peace Process(a.k.a.The Jungle Book)

I'm sure you heard Mitchel McLaughlin earlier this week describing events in the peace process as akin to 'Alice in Wonderland'.Alice in Wonderland?Nah Mitchel,as I'll show you it's really more like The Jungle Book!Here take a look at the great cast of characters:

Mowgli-Someone who finds himself in an environment where he's surrounded by lots of strange and bizarre characters?Why it's Paul Murphy,isn't it?!Poor guy.

Bagheera-The strong and cunning creature who often finds he's not appreciated by those around him.Why it's Tony Blair,of course!Hey,in the stories,Bagheera wasn't ever friends with an American ass was he?

Hathi-Ah yes,the elephant who led around his loyal band of fellow elephants.Why it's Bertie Ahern isn't it?!Oh Hathi proudly proclaimed an elephant never forgets and then went and proved this wasn't the case!Kind of like Bertie who frequently forgets to stick to the same story.D'oh!

Baloo-"Look for the bare necessities,the simple bare necessities,forget about your worries and your strife."Why it's Gerry Adams,isn't it?!We're always hearing him dismissing talk of the weapons issue and asking us to see the progress made!He's clearly Baloo!Look for the bare necessities,the simple bare necessities,forget about the guns and loss of life...

King Louie-Why it's got to be Nigel Dodds,obviously!The ape who declared in song to Murphy..uh I mean Mowgli,"Now,I'm the king of the swingers,Oh the jungle VIP,I've reached the top and had to stop,And that's what's botherin' me".See he's hungry for power!He wants rid of Paisley!I see what game your playing Dodds!
"Oh oobee do,I wanna be like you,I wanna walk like you,talk like you,too".Look out Murphy,Dodds wants your position!

Kaa-Oh that wily snake with its hypnotic eyes.Why it's Peter Robinson,isn't it?!Those mad eyes on him,don't look at them Murphy!"Trust in me" he sings.Yeah right!You're after power too!

Four vultures-Those four friendly vultures,why it's the UUP isn't it?Let's face it most of them look like vultures!Weren't the vultures based on the Beatles?I don't think there was one based on Yoko though.Shame as I really wanted to include Jeffrey Donaldson.Still,the vultures much like the UUP helped Mowgli from-Shere Khan!

Shere Khan-The self proclaimed rightful lord of the jungle,why it's Dr.Paisley,isn't it?!Murphy,like Mowgi,you have to stand up to this creature!He's tough but you're up to it!

As I said,the peace process-it's just like The Jungle Book!


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