Friday, April 28, 2006
6 ways to get the woman you want
Men of the world rejoice! A series of studies across America by a team from North Adams State College in Massachusetts has lead to the development of a six-step plan for lonely guys and gals to land themselves a partner.According to The Sun (and they're never wrong) it's a "foolproof plan" that "could help thousands of lonely Brits hook up with a partner."
OK I'm sure you're all dying to find out what the steps are. Well, without further ado:
1. Ply the man or woman of your dreams with dark chocolate - It is packed with phenylethylamine chemicals, which induce feelings of excitement conducive to falling in love.
2. Take your targeted sweetheart on a rollercoaster - The exhilarating ride creates an adrenaline rush, which makes people find the opposite sex more attractive.
3. Strike up a conversation and pepper it with jokes - Laughing boosts brain hormones called endorphins, which give you a feelgood factor.
4. Maintain eye contact for as long as possible - Holding a person’s gaze affects the area of the brain linked to rewards, making them feel appreciated.
5. Stand with your arms down by your sides - It makes others feel an affinity with you.
6. Put soft rock music on the stereo - This works especially for fellas, as girls find them more handsome when they hear easy-going rock in the background.
Seems simple enough. I wish I had this information years ago! Basically all you do is buy a lady some dark chocolate, I'm thinking Bourneville, and then you ask her to go on a rollercoaster with you. I'm not sure how exactly you achieve that in this country but I'm sure there's a way. Next you try and make her laugh - which could very well happen when she hears you explain why you wanted her to go on a rollercoaster so bad - and then it's case of heavy eye contact and straight arms. By that stage she'll be putty in your hands so you finish her off by whipping out your stereo and your irresistible soft rock tunes. Simon and Garfunkel anyone?
And they say romance is dead...
# posted by United Irelander @ 12:43 AM 
© 2008 United Irelander.
