Friday, February 03, 2006


Fun Irelander Feature - Valentine's nears

Ah February, how you torment us... So February arrived in the last few days. How time flies eh?

February signals the dawn of Spring and is renowned for being the shortest month of the year and...ah who am I kidding? We all know what February is renowned and feared for. The 14th day of the month - doomsday, aka Valentine's Day.

Yes the day when men all over the world fork out money on gifts in the hope that it will get them laid...or in some cases, the hope they will avoid that. A day that strikes fear into the hearts of many, and joy into the hearts of the naive fools who have yet to experience their love destroyed by the forces of reality.

Seeing as Valentine's Day draws near I have decided to take out a personal ad in the hope I will find romance (In the blogworld, I'm technically single). Some might think this is a pretty drastic step but even in the blogosphere we need to feel some semblance of romance. So without further ado, here is my winning ad:

Not-too-old-not-too-young man seeks attractive female to make Valentine's Day a tolerable occasion. She must be sympathetic to Irish nationalism, housework, Cork bashing, and Roy Keane's reaction to the Saipan incident. Ugs will not be taken into consideration. No boggers need apply...

"Hello ladies. Prepare to put down that dishcloth and leave the cooking to some other woman as the United Irelander takes you out, even paying for half the meal, as he rocks your world on Valentine's Day. Experience the sights and sounds of the local pub and chipper before retiring to a three star B&B to see where the evening takes us (single beds not an option)."

Don't miss out on this great catch, ladies!


<< Home

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

© 2008 United Irelander.